My First Meme- Weird/Random Facts about me

You guys are soo amazing.. i mean the support and love that you guys show me is soo overwhelming and gives me a ray of hope... I LOVE YOU GUYS SOO MUCH AND MAY GOD ALMIGHTY BLESS YOU IN ALL YOU DO!! Amen!

Ok Ok Arewa pull yourself together now!! So Zena tagged me just as i put up my last post and can you believe the girl tagged me again less than a week after.....and then What happens ...princesa also catches the tagging fever and tags me.....Nah wah for your girls ooh U wan kill me ......I'm being tagged all ova the damn place but no shaking... bring it on!!
So here goes ....... (Zena you better be reading this or else........)

This damn thing is even more difficult than I thought... i cant seem to think of any weird things about myself, so i guess i will go for random that's if i can think if any.....

1) I have never used a public toilet in my life .....i just cant do it no matter how hard i try not even in MacDonalds.....so i end up holding my weewee till i get to my final destination and trust me it not easy at all especially in the winter awwwww
I have been told that its bad habit to hold wee for that lon but I just cant do it!!

2)I can not stand the smell of bananas when other people eat them around me. Especially if the banana is very ripe...But i absolutely enjoy eating them myself

3)Now don't get me wrong on this one... I dont have a shoe fetish oooh..But the first think I look out for when i see a good looking guy( my kinda guy) anywhere be it it the shop, on the bus where ever... the next thing i look at are his shoes...if they are crusty and battered then he is a no no...and if his trousers rise up to / swing at his ankles when he sits down(and do not rest his shoes)then he has absolutely no chance...this was my criteria for men who tried to toast me and i still use it up till today even though i have a man.....so lets just say the length of a mans trousers and the state of his shoes tell me a lot about the sort of man he is......

4)I dance a lot better in front of my mirror than when I'm out in Public......I swear i could win the dance championships by dancing in front of my bedroom mirror .

I start of dancing like i have two left feet and then it gets a bit better but never as good as the steps i produce in my bedroom.

5)I always fantasied about getting married to an Oyinbo and having mixed race kids with long thick hair, when i was a kid. Only God only knows what the hell i was thinking back then.......I LOVE ME A STRONG BLACK MAN..A NAIJA ONE FOR THAT MATTER.....WINK WINK

6)I am totally against girls/ women who wash their panties in washing machines together with the rest of their clothes.......I am a traditionalist when it comes to washing of underwear.....i believe that panties should be washed by hand for best results and not in washing machines....i was thought to wash my panties proper proper by hand and my aunties were always there to inspect them to make sure that they were nice and clean

7)My first attempt at kissing a boy took place when i was 16 and trust me i couldn't even hack that i jumped when he tried to introduce his tongue into the whole equation....oh boy i was such a wussssss then (when all my mates had perfected the art of dropping it like its hot and the art of titillation...you know what i mean) ohhh the joys of teenage life.

The dude still teases me up till today...loL

DONE !!So there you go 7 wired and random facts about me.......

I am supposed to Tag 7 random people at the end of my post and include links to their blogs, so if you see your name below it means that i don tag you oohhhhh and don't act like you ain't seen it..Jaja, Ugo Daniels, guerreiranigeriana, Naapali, Belle, Writefreak & Sha

Have a nice week people...I'm out x x x

Letting it all out !!

Im hereee ooooh . Heres your update SOLOMONSYDELLE. Sha we are cool now..haaba..lol
How is everyone one doing.....?! Oh and Zena just in acse ur wondering my meme soon come.....

God has been good to us and has blessed us with another week which is almost comming to an end.....May He continue to have mercy on us and grant us peace in all that we do and May He continue to give us the strenth and courage to dea with the challenges that we face in our daily dealings.....Amen!!

Thanx for all the comments to my last blog... Esi's relationship is just a mystery to me .. I just cant understand why things just dont seem to be working out for them but maybe they just arent meant to be.

Esi and her man had a talk the other day and as usual nothing useful came out of it soo....my girl claims that her relationship is coming to an end.. i know she still loves him and is finding it hard to let go but ........i think she will do so in her own time. I just feel for her as she is soo depressed. Why do some relationships have to be soo full of drama....

Anyway moving on ......so i have had a bit of an emotional week and have to get it all of my chest so here goes:

Dreams become a road Though we cannot see, But yet from a path That shapes reality. Then the unmanifest is etched by pure design. The dreams are bought to life When faith and effort combine. For these are needed tools To carve a pathway through, The tunnel of success Which lies deep inside you. Though you see no path, Proceed with faith as eyes, For only by stepping out, Will the road before you rise.

.......i have beeen looking at my life in a very different light since breaking the news to my mum and it feels a bit weird. For once its all about me and no one else... i am training myself say NO! and to put myself first as no one (family) is prepared to do that for me and continue to be selfish in every way.

Reality hit me when i was down with the flu.....You see the thing is that I have 2 siblings ..an older sister then brother and i am the last. My sister suffers from sickle cell which means that she cant really do much and always needs to take things easy......My brother on the other hand is a mummy's boy, who continues to kiss my mums ass at his age (34) he does this and sides up with my mum even when she is wrong.....this his way of draw attention away from the things that he gets up to(dating all sorts of girls..and getting up to no good) he also has traits of Sickling but not as bad a s my sisters.

Ok so back to what i was saying.... I decided to go and see my GP on monday and fancied some light soup- Ghanaian version of pepper soup. Will u believe that i had to get on the busy after my appointment to go to the shops just to get meat fish and a few things to make myself soup....I ended up not being able to even eat the soup after making it as i had lost my appetite.

The reason why i felt so sorry for myself was that ........no one in my family mother, brother or sister even considered making soup for me. the point i am trying t make is that i felt like i was invincible to my family ....no one bothered to ask ..ah what do you really Fancy oooh?!

And yet when my mother needs something ..i will be the first person that she calls, when my siblings are in hospital, i am always the one who runs around doing hospital runs alongside work and my studies and yet when it come to me no one seem to be bothered. Dont get me wrong my mum called me on 2 occasions to see how i was doing but all of that was just ceremony... there was no feeling of care or sympathy from her.......my sister called on a few occasions my brother just asked me as few times if i wanted to try other forms of medication......all in tones that did not really show any care what so ever.
As a child, i always imagined that i will be spoilt and pampered as the last baby of the family but its been the opposite for me.....i have been maltreated and taken for granted by the people that are supposed to be my family.

When people talk to me and tell me about how important family is......what i ask them is a family is only important when they lend you support, show you love and make you feel like you belong. What good is a family that shows no love and only seems to want your downfall.

GOD FORBID OOH NOT ANYMORE......!!

I know that the bible says to forgive people who offend you......but how do you forgive people who offend you to the point of trying to take away your identity and wish you no good. specially when they continue to disrespect and maltreat you constantly.

I am only human and as hard as i try , theses things still get to me and all i do is pray for God to forgive them and ask him to for the strength to forgive them and move on with my life.......BUT HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO GO ON LIVING LIKE THIS .........?? HOW MUCH LONGER......THIS CANT BE RIGHT NOW......!!

I STARTED OFF WRITING THIS BLOG THINKING IT WAS JUST GOING TO BE A SHORT UPDATE .....AND I HAVE JUST REALISED HOW MUCH I HAVE BEEN GOING ON......I GUESS I JUST NEEDED TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST.

Theres soo much hurt in my heart that has been caused by my family but I am working on it and Iam letting it all go. I am trying to cleanse my heart and soul of all the hurt and pain that they have caused me over the last 10years.

I will give u a bit more insight as that moths go by ... but this part of my cleansing process.....with GOD LEADING THE WAY AND WITH HIS RAY OF LIGHT SHOWING ME THE WAY..... I KNOW I WILL MAKE IT........!!

Lord help me ... YOU ARE ALL I HAVE......MY STRENGTH AND MY SALVATION.......COME TO MY RESCUE!!!

I love u but..I dont TRUST u!!

Guess who is back in full swing.........me, maself and I ....the flu finally got the message and buggered off. Still feel a bit funky now and then but my GP claims that i should be ok by next week....Thank God for that cause there was no way i was going to be taking anymore agbo jedijedi and all those pescribed tablets.Trust me it was soo bad that MR started to call me a Druggie.....the bloody cheek.

Thanks for all the get well wishes and to those of u who didnt bother wishing me well ... lets just say ....WE SHALL SEE..(U know who u r..lol)

Ok so now i need your help people...... just a few ideas because i just cant seem to get my head around this whole issue:

One of my very good friends from back in the day called me just the other day to see how i was doing as we hadnt spoken in a quiet a while as we had both been really busy(lets call her Esi).....so I strated on the usual note asking about her family, her studies, work and then finally her man....she was answering as i threw the questions at her but i sensed a bit of hesitation when i asked about her man....all she said was ahh he is there compaired to the usual oh he is fine ooh ..i even just got of the phone with him blah blah blah...

So i started probing and probing.....next thing my friend just broke down in tears....saying how she was fed up and didnt know if she can deal with all of this anymore....Esi and her man have been togather for 8yrs and there has always been a bit of insecurity on her mans side.. he gets very paranoid when Esi fails to pick up his calls, he gets very jealous when she mentions her male friends or male aquientance even her Doctor.....as he had accused her of having something to do with him a while ago just because she felt very unwell a while ago and had to keep going in for regular check ups.

Heres a typical example....... Esi left her phone in a taxi last week and luckily had the phone returned to her local station a few hours later......there were about 10 missed calls on her phone 8 of which were from him....The phone rings a few minutes later the phone rings and Esi picks up:

Esi: Helloo?

Boyfriend: So ur picking up my call now?! i take it that u have finished doing whatever it wa u were doing with him

Esi: What r u on about.....i left my phone in a taxi and had it retured not even up to 10mins ago

Boyfriend: U mean u have finished with the man that uwerwe with sooo u can pick up now ..isny it?!

Esi: I dont know aht u r talking about.. did u not hear what i just told u

Boyfriend: U keep on doing whatever t is ur doing..we shall seee(then he hungs up)

Now in the begining when Esi use to complain to me about her mans behaviour.. I use to tell her that He would change after a while as he just needed some reassurance from her and we put it down to the fact thathe might have been really hurt in the past.....and also due to that fact that Esi is a very attractive young woman who turns heads whereever she goes......

But how do u begin understand this when it has gone on for soo long. What does it take to earn the trust f a man like this?.. I honestly dont know how Esi managed to put up with this for soo long .....I guess deep down she has always had some hope that things will change and that she would earn his trust somehow.....she has never cheated on him and has always been very true to him so where is all this comming from? And what happens now as he has started saying things like 'maybe u two should not be together anymore' and saying things like 'I LOVE U BUT I CANT TRUST U'?

What do i say to encourage her to keep holding on...or do i just tell her to up and go ? How long will u put up with a guy or a girl like this?Where does one start from when u break up from an 8yr relationship?

I honestly dont know how thier relationship has managed to thrive for 8yrs in this condition as I have always believed that TRUST is one of the most important elements that steers a relation in the right way....

Nothing but love xx x

Charlie Eti sen as my Ashanti Country man will say. ok now in Naija Fashion Wetin dey my people? ...lol Dont mind me just messing around...Im still a bit overwhelmed from the love and support that you guys showed on my last post topic..wow!! acainto, Zena, The Last King Of Scotland, WendyB, akin, Unbiased, Naapali, Ugo Daniels , Sassy, anonymous gal , Queen of My Castle , Writefreak, Aijay, Belle, Fatoumatta , Nyemoni, Olamild, 30+ , guerreiranigeriana , NikkiSab, AN IBO DUDE'S CORNER , 9jamommy, 36 INCHES OF BROWN LEGS, UnNaked Soul , Jinta , Teediva, cally-waffybabe , Overwhelmed Naija Babe, CATWALQ a.k.a LAGBA-JESS , princesa, UndaCovaSista ...I have got nothing but love for yalll, May God Almighty Continue to guide and bless you in all you do. AMEN

Those of you asking about wedding websites and Bridezilla Diaries ...na wah for you ooh...ibi like say i yan una say MR don propose...you guys are on another level ooh....but anyways no shaking as the jamaican man says 'soon come'!

My week hasnt been that great (no worries nothing to do with momsi...i'm so over her and her shakara) I have been struggeling with the flu for that past 2 weeks. Went to see my GP on Monday after taking a full dose of flu medicine plus Agbo gedijedi as adviced by MR. (who was begining to think that i was preggienant) only to be told by the doctor that (waiteeee now... i am not pregnant oooh so 4get dat..lol) I have a viral flu which takes up to 2 to 4 weeks to cure! 2 - 4 weeks ke....LORD HELP ME!

You see the reason why i am a bit upset is that ....MR and I have had a house guest visiting from Naija for the past 3 months and we were planing to have a dirty weekend(wink wink) this weekend. So it meant no hanky panky as the last thing i want to do is pass my flu on to MR and plus my stamina is not quiet up to speed...lol

So my next couple of weeks will be spent in bed....trying to nurse this aje Flu, while working on my assignments and hearing MR scream GOAL...BABA GOAL, AWOR....from the living room as he watches Man U the likes play footie.

I AM FUUUUMMMING!!!

None the less I must say things havent been that bad as i have been living my life like its GOLDEN(in Jill Scotts words) Taking everyday as it comes......

Anyway enough blabbing ..Im off to take my next dose of DAY NURSE......

Yall stay blessed and have a wonderful weekend.... i know I WONT.....l8r xx x

BREAKING THE NEWS - Update

TOO BLESSED TO BE STRESSED - So I am moving on....!

OK so where do i begin...well anyone who has been reading my blogs for the last few months will be aware of the situation with my mum not approving of the man i intend to spend the rest of my life with. Reason being: He is NIGERIAN(and I am Ghanaian) and also because he comes form a family with mixed religion( Christian and Muslim).

Mr and i have been seeing each other for almost 6yrs now and trust me it hasnt ben easy. As i have been doing my best and trying all things possible to put my mum in the picture for the last 4 years.. but she just keeps comming up with all these excuses and just wont send.

So a few months ago Mr and I had a heart to heart about the future of our relationship and decided that it was time for me to step up and tell my mum of our intention to take our relationship to the next level by getting engaged and then married once I graduate from University in June.

This was not an easy decision to make at all and trust me I was scared to break the news to my mum as I didnt how I would handle things if she went off on one....so i spoke to a lot of my Uncles, Aaunties and Cousins for some advise on the best way to go about thing. All this time praying and fasting about it as i felt a bit lost and needed direction and the strength to break the news to my mum.

The plan was to get my cousin and Uncle to sit with me while i talked to mum but things did not go accordingly, so i decided to take matters into my own hads and speak to my mum one on one.

But trust me I was still kinda scared when the time came........thinking back now.. I dont really know why i was scared....i guess it was just because i finally had to stand up to my mum about my future with MR. As i have allowed them to dictate to me for soo long.

Lets just say that ...... I was not expecting her to jump for joy and finally accept and respect my decision. After saying all that i had intended to say to her about family introductions and all our other plans..all she said was that she was not ready to meet Mr's family.

I thought ...Well at least she did not say oner her dead body and stress the fact that she wont attend our wedding if we intend to take things furthur......so thats a change.

I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulder after speaking to her although she still does not approve.......Mr and I are now making arrangements for the necesaary prcedures to follow... but in the time being, my Uncles and Aunties are still on my side and trying to gradually get my mum tochange her mind.

All of this is just not fair on me... I have dedicated over 25yrs of my life to family and they still want to have me attending to thier needs forever... NO WAY.

I just dont get it. I am the only one that my mum and sibblings call on when they need help but no one is e ver there for me. They never give a damn about anything my needs but are always tryingh to tell mewhat to do when it comes to decisions in my life that caoncern my future. that cant be right.

I know that families are very important in our lives but what do u do when this same family never seem to want whats best for you and respect your decisions.

They never give u a pat on the back .. or say well done or Thank u for anything that i do.....they just keep trying to hold me back in everything that involves me moving on in my life.

Why!!!Why cant they just leave me alone!!

I THOUGHT FAMILIES ARE MEANT TO SUPPORT YOU IN WHATEVER U DO AND BE THERE FOR ONE ANOTHER......DAMN!

IM JUST SOOO FED UP!

A lot of people have adviced me to go on and do what I feel is best for me and that my mum will come around in the end..as her behaviour has nothing to do with MR but rather with the fact that she doesnt want to let me go/lose me.. but trust me its not easy!!

Words of Inspiration that have kept me going so far....

When the burden that you carry seems impossible to endure just look up to the Lord for your help from him is sure.
He knows just what you need, You're his child after all, Just call upon his precious name He will never let you fall.
And through it all continue to praise, Knowing that you'll be set free, seek his face, He's always be there, Have faith and you'll see

Looking back at my life so far.. i have really been blessed in so many ways and accept that I need to count my blessings and be Thankful to the Almighty and commit all my worries unto him so my concluding phrase for this blog will be :

I AM TOO BLESSED TO BE STRESSED!!

BLACK HISTORY MONTH !!

Black History Month has been celebrated in the UK ever October for over 30years. It was set up to commemorate and celebrate the achievements of the black community and to also uncover the hidden history about our communities -BHM Website.

I am very passionate about my culture and heritage and always defend it to the best of my ability. This is not very easy when you live in a society where people take you for granted and belittle you just because of the colour of your skin, where the only ideas that your friends and colleagues have of your so called country of birth is what they see in Oxfam Adverts and on CNN,where people think that all Africans live in huts and that Africa is country and not a continent!

Most of us have left our countries of birth in search of greener pastures but let us not forget who we are and where we come from.....be proud of who u are and where u from and no one can ever take that away from you.

I came across this poem by Wayne Visser( a South African Poet) during my first year when I was carrying out some research for my Media Studies assignment. Just thought i share it with u.

I AM AN AFRICAN........

I am an African Not because I was born there But because my heart beats with Africa’s

I am an African Not because my skin is black But because my mind is engaged by Africa
I am an African Not because I live on its soil But because my soul is at home in Africa

When Africa weeps for her children My cheeks are stained with tears

When Africa honours her elders My head is bowed in respect

When Africa mourns for her victims My hands are joined in prayer

When Africa celebrates her triumphs My feet are alive with dancing

I am an African For her blue skies take my breath away And my hope for the future is bright

I am an African For her people greet me as family And teach me the meaning of community

I am an African For her wildness quenches my spirit And brings me closer to the source of life When the music of Africa beats in the wind My blood pulses to its rhythm And I become the essence of music

When the colours of Africa dazzle in the sun My senses drink in its rainbow And I become the palette of nature

When the stories of Africa echo round the fire My feet walk in its pathways And I become the footprints of history

I am an African Because she is the cradle of our birth And nurtures an ancient wisdom

I am an African Because she lives in the world’s shadow And bursts with a radiant luminosity

I am an African Because she is the land of tomorrow And I recognise that her gifts as sacred

HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH!!!

Why men cheat !

Ok so i decided to help one of my friends with some resech as she writes for one womens magazine.....she was just looking up interesting topics for the copule of months ...s o i thpught what the heck let me just help a sister out....Trust me it was soo much fun....I came across a few articles and findings that will be sharing with you....as I would like to hear what the guys and ladies out there think about this issue so here goes. i have edited some of it but but trust me the juicey bits are all intact....Enjoy!!

The findings and quotes in this article are all opinions expressed by iVillage members(Womens website).
Source/Credits: Abby Schwartz and Eileen Livers

Like it or not men cheat. They stare @other girls even when you are with them(looku looku) . They're obsessed with big butts and big boobs…
The married ones come home late from work with the excuse of having to work late or attending one meeting, then the poor wives find lipstick marks on their collars.
Research carried out by iVillage reveled that men do cheat and they definitely cheat more than their female counterpart.
In the original Kinsey Report, published more than 50 years ago, approximately 60 per cent of men, compared to 30 per cent of women, were unfaithful to their spouses before the age of 40. (Now that's not nice)Those numbers have remained much the same in subsequent studies over the years. So reading on…..I finally got to what I really wanted to know

WHY DO MEN CHEAT?

1. SEX: Men just can't control their eyes, hands and ...'Women need a reason to have an affair, men just need a place' - go_getter'Men will cheat if given the opportunity. They are just like that! They can be happy in their relationship and life, but if the opportunity to cheat is there, they will do it! I really believe they can't help it.' - ldrake5477'I asked my boyfriend why men cheat.... He said, 'Men do it for sex'. He said that a man can have sex with another woman and not feel anything for her' - pismotam

2. QUICK FIX: Although sneaking around takes a lot of effort, many iVillagers believe that more effort is required to salvage a rocky relationship.'People have affairs because they are lazy. It is easier to go running off with the office tramp than it is to admit something is wrong with your relationship and make a commitment to work on it' - jesusfreak1'I think if people took half the time and effort they put into sneaking around and channelled that energy into making a great marriage or relationship, they would realise that, most of the time, what they are looking for has always been with them.' - who_dat'Sometimes the thought of divorcing and changing everyone's lives is much too hard to handle. So the easier choice is an affair. I don't think it's the right choice, but most people will take the easier road, thinking no one will be hurt because they are keeping the marriage and family intact. - lovestargazer

3. THE FRAGILE MALE EGO: We all like to be complimented by the opposite sex and, according to many iVillage women, that's the ground for most men's affairs.'My now ex-husband not only cheated on me but on every former lover, girlfriend and wife (one before me) with whom he was involved. It was an emotional thing. He had to prove to himself that he was attractive and appreciated by women. It was his way of judging himself and his own self worth. - laughingagain 'I think unfaithfulness goes hand in hand with low self-worth. Cheaters seek approval or fulfilment in the eyes of another person when they should be looking within themselves.' - weasy71 'I think it has a lot more to do with how the cheater fells about his/her self, rather than how the cheater feels about his/her spouse.' - lee_823

4. TO FILL A VOID: Many iVillagers concluded that men cheat because they are not satisfied with their relationships. When something is missing, be it regular sex or healthy communication, men try to fill this gap with an affair. 'Just like women, men cheat when there is something lacking in a relationship. The wife may not even see what's missing. Maybe the man wants kinkier sex and is afraid to ask, or has already been turned down. Maybe he's cheating with another woman who doesn't nag him.' - barrysgal 'My husband and I had problems, and he tried to solve them with someone else. It didn't solve them - it just made them worse.' - djb61 'I guess, in a nutshell, the reason why a spouse cheats is because he/she feels alone.' - olivepop

5. SELFISHNESS: Whether they're immature, greedy or just haven't got a clue, some men don't value or respect their partners, say iVillagers. 'Sometimes people cheat in a marriage because they are not mature enough to understand and live by their vows.' - meanmommy 'Cheating is one of the most selfish acts a person can commit, because despite the fact that they entered into a relationship with another person they choose to act as though they are the only one whose feelings, needs and desires matter.' - nura_p 'Somehow we've become so convinced about what we're entitled to that we have completely lost sight of what we are responsible for. It doesn't matter who gets hurt, as long as we get what we want.' - juliewho 'I believe some people are so needy they devour their partner's love and move on.' - aZVDB

I WAS IN STITCHES AFTER READING THIS LET ME KNOW WHAT U THINK....l8r XXX